Dictionary

Napoleon: There are no words called IMPOSSIBLE and FEAR in my dictionary.
Sardar: What should I do ? You should have checked it before buying

Omelet

Sardar breaks an egg to make omelet, but notices that the omelet was empty.

He shouts: “Now a days , even hens have started family planning” !

Toilet

An Englishman and a Sardar were in a toilet.

Englishman: How do you do ?

Sardar: Good morning ! We remove underwear and do !!

Disturbance

“Try to understand me and don’t disturb me. Leave me alone. Last night I didn’t sleep thinking of you… So please don’t play with my life.” – Sardar telling to a mosquito

Eye specialist

Sardar1: Did you consult the eye doctor about your eyes ?

Sardar2: Yes, but the doctor was more blind than me.

Sardar1: How do you know ?

Sardar2: He was looking at my eyes with a torch !

Proposal

Sardar proposed a girl.

Girl: I am 1 year elder to you

Sardar: Oye ! No problem Soniye !! I will marry you next year

Tamilian

Sardar: I know Tamil. For "come here" "inge va"

Tamilian: Fine, what do you say for "go there" ?

Sardar: Oye ! Simple yaar. I will go there and tell "inge va"

Mirror

Sardar: What's the guarantee for this mirror ?

Salesman: Drop it from 100 feet height.. it will not break till the 99th feet

Sardar: Amazing ! Pack it

Explosion

Two sardars were fixing a bomb on a car..

Sardar1: What if the bomb explodes when we are fixing it ?

Sardar2: Don't worry.. I have one more

Mistake

Sardar was writing past tence of "I make a mistake"

Guess what he wrote ?

"I was made by a mistake"

Powercut

Ek raat power jaane ke baad..

Sardar1: Jaldi se fan chlao.
Sardar2: kar di na sardaron wali baat,fan on karenge to candle nahin bhuj jayegi.

Bombs..

2 Sardar ko 3 bomb mile. Police ko dene chale.

Sardar 1: Agar koi bomb raste me phat gaya to ?

Sardar 2: Jhoot bol denge ki sirf 2 hi mile the.

Beemaari

Friend: Yaar, tujhe to Cancer hai. Par tum sabko AIDS kyun bataataa hai ?

Sardar: Taki mere marne ke baad meri biwi ko koi line na maare.

Marriage

Sardar set his marriage on March second.

His invitation read: "Marriage on March second. Please come on first night"

Train on Platform

Sardar, standing on a platform, suddenly jumps on a railway track.

Man: Oye Sardarji.. mar jaaoge.

Sardarji: Marega tho tu.. Sunaa nahi ? Train platform par aa rahi hai.

Student..

How do you identify a Sardar in a classroom ?

It is simple.. check who's erasing his notes when the teacher is cleaning the board.