Sardarji Jokes

Sugar Test

2007-04-11T21:33:00.000-07:00

Sardar enters kitchen, opens sugar box, looks inside and closes it. This he does again and again. Why?

Because the doctor told him to check sugar regularly

Apple in a Mango Tree

2007-04-11T21:18:00.000-07:00

Sardar climbed a tree. Monkey asked: "Too uper kyon aaya?"

Sardar: "Apple Khane"

Monkey: "Yeh to mango tree"

Sardar: "Idiot, apple saath laaya hoon"

Sardars and scooter

2007-03-27T11:42:00.000-07:00

Three Sardars were going on a scooter. Traffic police showed them his hand. One of the Sardars told: We are already three, sorry, there is no space

Lion and Sardars

2007-03-25T13:38:00.000-07:00

Two Sardars were in a forest, when a lion came roaring towards them. One of them throws sand into its eyes, and runs. Second one stays unmoved. When asked why he is not running, another Sardar tells: "Why should I be running? It is you who has thrown the sand "

Cyclone

2007-03-10T09:06:00.000-08:00

Bank manager asks Sardar in an interview: "What is cyclone"

Sardar: "It is the loan given to purchase a cycle"

Side Effects

2007-02-24T09:12:00.000-08:00

Once Sardar brought some tablets and started cutting the edges. Do you know why? He wanted to avoid side effects!

Same person

2007-02-02T08:21:00.000-08:00

Sardar looked himself in a mirror and said: "Isko kahin dekha hai... Haan! Yaad aaya, yeh to wahi kameena hai jo mere shaadi ke album mein mere biwi ke saath hai"

Bus tickets

2007-02-01T02:17:00.001-08:00

Bus conductor: Ticket, ticket

Sardar: Give two tickets

Conductor: Why two?

Sardar: If I lose one, another will be there

Conductor: What if you lose both?

Sardar: No problem, I have pass...

Advice

2007-02-01T02:11:00.000-08:00

A famous Sardar's declaration to the media: "I will never marry in my life. And I will advise the same to my children too"

Oxygen

2007-02-01T02:09:00.000-08:00

Teacher: Oxygen is very essential to life. It was discovered in 1773

Sardar: Thank God!! I was born after 1773. Had I born earlier, I would have died...

Skeleton

2007-02-01T02:04:00.000-08:00

Interviewer: What is a skeleton?

Sardar: Sir, skeleton is a person who started dieting, but forgot to stop it!!

Starting Salary

2007-01-31T09:24:00.000-08:00

MD: I give you driver job. Starting salary is 2000 Rs.

Sardar: Oh, thank you. What is the driving salary and stopping salary?

New moon day

2007-01-27T04:40:00.000-08:00

ISRO sent a Sardar to Moon. Sardar got into rocket, but jumped halfway, shouting "How dare you cheat me. Today is new moon day. There will be no moon"

Mirror

2007-01-27T04:36:00.000-08:00

Boss: Ek achcha mirror leke ao, jisme mujhe mera chehra dikhayi de.
Sardar: Boss, mein sab dukaan gaya, par sab mein mere hi chehra dikha... Apka chehra dikhanewala kahin nahi mila

Hindi and English

2007-01-24T07:06:00.001-08:00

Sardarni to a doctor: Mera beta motorcycle se gir gaya
Doctor: I can't understand Hindi. Can you tell in English
Sardarni: My londa gironda from Hero Honda

Yes/No

2007-01-12T18:46:00.000-08:00

Sardar reported for his university final examination, which consists of Yes/No type questions. He takes his seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing it, marking the answer sheet Yes for Heads and No for Tails.

Within half an hour he is all done whereas the rest of the class is sweating it out. During the last few minutes, he is seen desperately flipping the coin, muttering and sweating.

The moderator, alarmed, approaches his and asks what is going on.

Sardar replies, "I'm rechecking my answers and I don't think I did very good."

Microsoft Office

2007-01-12T09:08:00.000-08:00

Interviewer: Do you know Microsoft Office?
Sardar: No, but I can find it if you give address...

Compound Sentence

2007-01-12T09:07:00.000-08:00

Teacher: Tell a compound sentence.
Sardar: Stick No Bills!

Colour TV

2007-01-04T00:51:00.001-08:00

Sardar bought a new colour TV and put it in water. Why?

He wanted to check whether colour goes or not!!

Calender

2007-01-01T10:44:00.001-08:00

A person went to a Sardar's shop.

Person: I want 2007 calender

Sardar: Sorry sir, you are too late. We have only 1000 calenders left

Lottery

2007-01-01T00:12:00.001-08:00

Sardar bought a lottery ticket for 10 Rs. Luckily Sardar won 10 crores for that. He went to the shop to collect the prize money. The owner cut the tax and gave him 7 crores.

Sardar: Give me full 10 crores or give my 10 Rs. back

Imagination

2007-01-01T00:06:00.001-08:00

Sardar went to an interview.

Interviewer: Imagine that you are in the fifteenth floor. Suddenly fire bursts out, and there are many people who are struggling to survive. In that situation, what do you do ?

Sardar: Oye! I will stop imagining

ATM PIN

2006-12-23T12:44:00.001-08:00

Sardar was drawing money from ATM.

A person, who was just behind him in the line said, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! I've seen ur password. Its 4 asterisks (****).

Sardar replies, "Ha! Ha! Ha! You are wrong. Its 1258."

Sun v/s Moon

2006-12-19T13:41:00.001-08:00

Sardar's theory: The moon is more important than the sun, because the moon gives light at night when it is needed, but the sun gives light during day when it is available abundantly...

Delivered

2006-12-19T12:21:00.000-08:00

Sardar sent a SMS to his pregnant wife. Two seconds later a report came to his phone and he started dancing. Why?

The report said, "DELIVERED".

No brake !

2006-12-04T19:35:00.001-08:00

Sardar was riding a bike... A police tried to stop him
Police: "Stop! Stop!! Your bike doesn't have headlight"
Sardar: "It doesn't have breaks too"

Arrival

2006-12-04T19:34:00.000-08:00

Sardar fell from first floor. People gathered. One of them asked Sardar: "What happened"
Sardar: "I too don't know.. I came here just now"

We are first

2006-12-04T19:32:00.000-08:00

Russia: We are first in space
USA: We are first on the Moon
Sardar: We are first on the Sun
Russia & USA: The Sun is very hot. You will get burnt
Sardar: Do you think we are idiots? We go there at night

Powder

2006-11-17T15:52:00.000-08:00

Salesman: Sir, do you want this powder ?
Sardar: For what ?
Salesman: For ants
Sardar: No. If I give powder today, they will ask lipstick tomorrow

Mobile Bill

2006-11-17T15:27:00.000-08:00

Sardar: Oye.. Mera mobile bill kitna hai ?
Call Centre Girl: Sir, just dial 123 to get your current bill status.
Sardar: Abbey STUPID, current ka nahi mobile ka bill chaahiye !

State of river

2006-11-08T06:44:00.000-08:00

In the Kaun Banega Karod Pathi show:
Amitabh: In which state does the river Cauvery flow ?
Sardar: Liquid
All audience clapped. Amitabh is stunned, looks back. All were Sardars !!

Kamath Hotel

2006-11-03T08:56:00.000-08:00

Once Sardarji went to a hotel. But he took only tea and came back. Why ?
Because it was Kamath (Kha-mat) hotel !!

Telescope

2006-11-03T08:48:00.000-08:00

An astronomer was watching the sky using his telescope. A sardar was observing him. Suddenly a star falls... Sardar shouts: "Kya nishana lagaya boss !!"

Mobile Thief

2006-11-03T08:41:00.000-08:00

Ek chor ne sardar ka mobile leke bhag gaya... Sardar ne haste haste bola "Bhag le bhag, bevakoof, charger to mere paas hai !!"

Foreigner

2006-11-03T08:17:00.000-08:00

After returning home from a foreign trip, sardar asked his wife: "Do I look like a foreigner ?"
Wife: "No.. Why ?"
Sardar: "In London, a lady asked me whether I am a foreigner !!"

Flag

2006-11-03T08:15:00.000-08:00

Ek sardar Indian flag lene gaya. Flag dekh kar sardar ne kuch bola, jise sunkar dukaanwala behoosh ho gaya... Guess what did sardar say ? "Isme aur colour dikhao"

Plumber

2006-11-01T05:20:00.000-08:00

Sardar came to the exam with a plumber. Reason ? He had heard that the question paper was leaked !!

Hello Tune

2006-11-01T05:18:00.000-08:00

One person to Sardar: I called you so many times, and your cell said "Switched off"
Sardar: Oye! Woh to meri hello tune hai !!

Boring book

2006-10-30T05:20:00.000-08:00

A sardar spent 3 hours in a library reading a book, and then said, "So boring yaar... So many characters but no story"
Librarian said: "Sardarji this is a telephone directory"

Dice Game

2006-10-26T10:19:00.000-07:00

A sardar soldier cought an enemy soldier.

Sardar: Play this dice. If you get 1,2,3,4 or 5 I will leave you.
Enemy: What if I get 6 ?
Sardar: You have to play again !!

Poison

2006-10-24T09:25:00.000-07:00

A Sardar was getting bitten by mosquitoes the whole night. He got irritated. He drank the poison and said: "Ab kaato saalo... Sab maroge"

Birthday

2006-10-08T00:20:00.000-07:00

Sardar went for an interview.

Question: When is your birthday ?
Sardar: Jan 15.
Question: Which year ?
Sardar: Every year !!

Dictionary

2006-09-27T08:57:00.000-07:00

Napoleon: There are no words called IMPOSSIBLE and FEAR in my dictionary.
Sardar: What should I do ? You should have checked it before buying

Omelet

2006-09-26T07:53:00.000-07:00

Sardar breaks an egg to make omelet, but notices that the omelet was empty.

He shouts: “Now a days , even hens have started family planning” !

Toilet

2006-09-20T08:15:00.000-07:00

An Englishman and a Sardar were in a toilet.

Englishman: How do you do ?

Sardar: Good morning ! We remove underwear and do !!

Disturbance

2006-09-07T10:35:00.000-07:00

“Try to understand me and don’t disturb me. Leave me alone. Last night I didn’t sleep thinking of you… So please don’t play with my life.” – Sardar telling to a mosquito

Eye specialist

2006-09-07T10:12:00.000-07:00

Sardar1: Did you consult the eye doctor about your eyes ?

Sardar2: Yes, but the doctor was more blind than me.

Sardar1: How do you know ?

Sardar2: He was looking at my eyes with a torch !

Proposal

2006-09-04T07:17:00.000-07:00

Sardar proposed a girl.

Girl: I am 1 year elder to you

Sardar: Oye ! No problem Soniye !! I will marry you next year

Tamilian

2006-09-04T07:15:00.000-07:00

Sardar: I know Tamil. For "come here" "inge va"

Tamilian: Fine, what do you say for "go there" ?

Sardar: Oye ! Simple yaar. I will go there and tell "inge va"

Mirror

2006-09-04T07:11:00.000-07:00

Sardar: What's the guarantee for this mirror ?

Salesman: Drop it from 100 feet height.. it will not break till the 99th feet

Sardar: Amazing ! Pack it

Explosion

2006-09-04T07:05:00.000-07:00

Two sardars were fixing a bomb on a car..

Sardar1: What if the bomb explodes when we are fixing it ?

Sardar2: Don't worry.. I have one more

Mistake

2006-09-04T07:02:00.000-07:00

Sardar was writing past tence of "I make a mistake"

Guess what he wrote ?

"I was made by a mistake"

Powercut

2006-08-07T16:39:00.000-07:00

Ek raat power jaane ke baad..

Sardar1: Jaldi se fan chlao.
Sardar2: kar di na sardaron wali baat,fan on karenge to candle nahin bhuj jayegi.

Bombs..

2006-08-05T09:40:00.004-07:00

2 Sardar ko 3 bomb mile. Police ko dene chale.

Sardar 1: Agar koi bomb raste me phat gaya to ?

Sardar 2: Jhoot bol denge ki sirf 2 hi mile the.

Beemaari

2006-08-05T09:40:00.003-07:00

Friend: Yaar, tujhe to Cancer hai. Par tum sabko AIDS kyun bataataa hai ?

Sardar: Taki mere marne ke baad meri biwi ko koi line na maare.

Marriage

2006-08-05T09:40:00.002-07:00

Sardar set his marriage on March second.

His invitation read: "Marriage on March second. Please come on first night"

Train on Platform

2006-08-05T09:40:00.001-07:00

Sardar, standing on a platform, suddenly jumps on a railway track.

Man: Oye Sardarji.. mar jaaoge.

Sardarji: Marega tho tu.. Sunaa nahi ? Train platform par aa rahi hai.

Student..

2006-08-05T09:40:00.000-07:00

How do you identify a Sardar in a classroom ?

It is simple.. check who's erasing his notes when the teacher is cleaning the board.